19 The two angels arrived at Sodom in the evening, and Lot was sitting in the gateway of the city. When he saw them, he got up to meet them and bowed down with his face to the ground. 2 “My lords,” he said, “please turn aside to your servant’s house. You can wash your feet and spend the night and then go on your way early in the morning.”
“No,” they answered, “we will spend the night in the square.”
3 But he insisted so strongly that they did go with him and entered his house. He prepared a meal for them, baking bread without yeast, and they ate. 4 Before they had gone to bed, all the men from every part of the city of Sodom—both young and old—surrounded the house. 5 They called to Lot, “Where are the men who came to you tonight? Bring them out to us so that we can have sex with them.”
6 Lot went outside to meet them and shut the door behind him 7 and said, “No, my friends. Don’t do this wicked thing. 8 Look, I have two daughters who have never slept with a man. Let me bring them out to you, and you can do what you like with them. But don’t do anything to these men, for they have come under the protection of my roof.”
9 “Get out of our way,” they replied. “This fellow came here as a foreigner, and now he wants to play the judge! We’ll treat you worse than them.” They kept bringing pressure on Lot and moved forward to break down the door.
10 But the men inside reached out and pulled Lot back into the house and shut the door. 11 Then they struck the men who were at the door of the house, young and old, with blindness so that they could not find the door.
12 The two men said to Lot, “Do you have anyone else here—sons-in-law, sons or daughters, or anyone else in the city who belongs to you? Get them out of here, 13 because we are going to destroy this place. The outcry to the Lord against its people is so great that he has sent us to destroy it.”
14 So Lot went out and spoke to his sons-in-law, who were pledged to marry[a] his daughters. He said, “Hurry and get out of this place, because the Lord is about to destroy the city!” But his sons-in-law thought he was joking.
15 With the coming of dawn, the angels urged Lot, saying, “Hurry! Take your wife and your two daughters who are here, or you will be swept away when the city is punished.”
16 When he hesitated, the men grasped his hand and the hands of his wife and of his two daughters and led them safely out of the city, for the Lord was merciful to them. 17 As soon as they had brought them out, one of them said, “Flee for your lives! Don’t look back, and don’t stop anywhere in the plain! Flee to the mountains or you will be swept away!”
18 But Lot said to them, “No, my lords,[b] please! 19 Your[c] servant has found favor in your[d] eyes, and you[e] have shown great kindness to me in sparing my life. But I can’t flee to the mountains; this disaster will overtake me, and I’ll die. 20 Look, here is a town near enough to run to, and it is small. Let me flee to it—it is very small, isn’t it? Then my life will be spared.”
21 He said to him, “Very well, I will grant this request too; I will not overthrow the town you speak of. 22 But flee there quickly, because I cannot do anything until you reach it.” (That is why the town was called Zoar.[f])
23 By the time Lot reached Zoar, the sun had risen over the land. 24 Then the Lord rained down burning sulfur on Sodom and Gomorrah—from the Lord out of the heavens. 25 Thus he overthrew those cities and the entire plain, destroying all those living in the cities—and also the vegetation in the land. 26 But Lot’s wife looked back, and she became a pillar of salt.
27 Early the next morning Abraham got up and returned to the place where he had stood before the Lord. 28 He looked down toward Sodom and Gomorrah, toward all the land of the plain, and he saw dense smoke rising from the land, like smoke from a furnace.
29 So when God destroyed the cities of the plain, he remembered Abraham, and he brought Lot out of the catastrophe that overthrew the cities where Lot had lived.
1. Genesis 19:14 Or were married to
2. Genesis 19:18 Or No, Lord; or No, my lord
3. Genesis 19:19 The Hebrew is singular.
4. Genesis 19:19 The Hebrew is singular.
5. Genesis 19:19 The Hebrew is singular.
6. Genesis 19:22 Zoar means small.
Genesis 1:27-28 (NKJV)
27 So God created man in His own image; in the image of God He created him; male and female He created them. 28 Then God blessed them, and God said to them, “Be fruitful and multiply; fill the earth and subdue it; have dominion over the fish of the sea, over the birds of the air, and over every living thing that moves on the earth.”
Genesis 2:18-24 (NKJV)
18 And the Lord God said, “It is not good that man should be alone; I will make him a helper comparable to him.” 19 Out of the ground the Lord God formed every beast of the field and every bird of the air, and brought them to Adam to see what he would call them. And whatever Adam called each living creature, that was its name. 20 So Adam gave names to all cattle, to the birds of the air, and to every beast of the field. But for Adam there was not found a helper comparable to him.
21 And the Lord God caused a deep sleep to fall on Adam, and he slept; and He took one of his ribs, and closed up the flesh in its place. 22 Then the rib which the Lord God had taken from man He made into a woman, and He brought her to the man.
23 And Adam said:
“This is now bone of my bones
And flesh of my flesh;
She shall be called Woman,
Because she was taken out of Man.”
24 Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.
Leviticus 18:22 (NKJV)
22 You shall not lie with a male as with a woman. It is an abomination.
Leviticus 20:13 (NKJV)
13 If a man lies with a male as he lies with a woman, both of them have committed an abomination. They shall surely be put to death. Their blood shall be upon them.
Deuteronomy 22:5 (NKJV)
5 “A woman shall not wear anything that pertains to a man, nor shall a man put on a woman’s garment, for all who do so are an abomination to the Lord your God.
Romans 1:24-27 (NIV)
24 Therefore God gave them over in the sinful desires of their hearts to sexual impurity for the degrading of their bodies with one another. 25 They exchanged the truth about God for a lie, and worshiped and served created things rather than the Creator—who is forever praised. Amen.
26 Because of this, God gave them over to shameful lusts. Even their women exchanged natural sexual relations for unnatural ones. 27 In the same way the men also abandoned natural relations with women and were inflamed with lust for one another. Men committed shameful acts with other men, and received in themselves the due penalty for their error.
1 Corinthians 6:9-11 (NIV)
9 Or do you not know that wrongdoers will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived: Neither the sexually immoral nor idolaters nor adulterers nor men who have sex with men[a] 10 nor thieves nor the greedy nor drunkards nor slanderers nor swindlers will inherit the kingdom of God. 11 And that is what some of you were. But you were washed, you were sanctified, you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and by the Spirit of our God.
1. 1 Corinthians 6:9 The words men who have sex with men translate two Greek words that refer to the passive and active participants in homosexual acts.
1 Timothy 1:8-10 (NIV)
8 We know that the law is good if one uses it properly. 9 We also know that the law is made not for the righteous but for lawbreakers and rebels, the ungodly and sinful, the unholy and irreligious, for those who kill their fathers or mothers, for murderers, 10 for the sexually immoral, for those practicing homosexuality, for slave traders and liars and perjurers—and for whatever else is contrary to the sound doctrine
James 5:19-20 (NIV)
19 My brothers and sisters, if one of you should wander from the truth and someone should bring that person back, 20 remember this: Whoever turns a sinner from the error of their way will save them from death and cover over a multitude of sins.
Proverbs 4:14-16 (NKJV)
14 Do not enter the path of the wicked,
And do not walk in the way of evil.
15 Avoid it, do not travel on it;
Turn away from it and pass on.
16 For they do not sleep unless they have done evil;
And their sleep is taken away unless they make someone fall.
2 Thessalonians 2:11 (NIV)
11 For this reason God sends them a powerful delusion so that they will believe the lie
Romans 6:18 (NIV)
18 You have been set free from sin and have become slaves to righteousness.
Proverbs 28:13 (NKJV)
13 He who covers his sins will not prosper,
But whoever confesses and forsakes them will have mercy.
Psalm 22:4-5 (NKJV)
4 Our fathers trusted in You;
They trusted, and You delivered them.
5 They cried to You, and were delivered;
They trusted in You, and were not ashamed.
James 4:7 (NIV)
7 Submit yourselves, then, to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you.
Romans 6:6 (NIV)
6 For we know that our old self was crucified with him so that the body ruled by sin might be done away with,[a] that we should no longer be slaves to sin—
1. Romans 6:6 Or be rendered powerless
Isaiah 1:18 (NKJV)
18 “Come now, and let us reason together,”
Says the Lord,
“Though your sins are like scarlet,
They shall be as white as snow;
Though they are red like crimson,
They shall be as wool.
Isaiah 40:31 (NKJV)
31 But those who wait on the Lord
Shall renew their strength;
They shall mount up with wings like eagles,
They shall run and not be weary,
They shall walk and not faint.
Psalm 1 (NKJV)
1 Blessed is the man
Who walks not in the counsel of the ungodly,
Nor stands in the path of sinners,
Nor sits in the seat of the scornful;
2 But his delight is in the law of the Lord,
And in His law he meditates day and night.
3 He shall be like a tree
Planted by the rivers of water,
That brings forth its fruit in its season,
Whose leaf also shall not wither;
And whatever he does shall prosper.
4 The ungodly are not so,
But are like the chaff which the wind drives away.
5 Therefore the ungodly shall not stand in the judgment,
Nor sinners in the congregation of the righteous.
6 For the Lord knows the way of the righteous,
But the way of the ungodly shall perish.
Ecclesiastes 11:9 (NKJV)
9 Rejoice, O young man, in your youth,
And let your heart cheer you in the days of your youth;
Walk in the ways of your heart,
And in the sight of your eyes;
But know that for all these
God will bring you into judgment.
Romans 6:12-13 (NIV)
12 Therefore do not let sin reign in your mortal body so that you obey its evil desires. 13 Do not offer any part of yourself to sin as an instrument of wickedness, but rather offer yourselves to God as those who have been brought from death to life; and offer every part of yourself to him as an instrument of righteousness.
1 Corinthians 10:13 (NIV)
13 No temptation[a] has overtaken you except what is common to mankind. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted[b] beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted,[c] he will also provide a way out so that you can endure it.
1. 1 Corinthians 10:13 The Greek for temptation and tempted can also mean testing and tested.
2. 1 Corinthians 10:13 The Greek for temptation and tempted can also mean testing and tested.
3. 1 Corinthians 10:13 The Greek for temptation and tempted can also mean testing and tested.
1 Corinthians 6:15-20 Version (NIV)
15 Do you not know that your bodies are members of Christ himself? Shall I then take the members of Christ and unite them with a prostitute? Never! 16 Do you not know that he who unites himself with a prostitute is one with her in body? For it is said, “The two will become one flesh.”[a] 17 But whoever is united with the Lord is one with him in spirit.[b]
18 Flee from sexual immorality. All other sins a person commits are outside the body, but whoever sins sexually, sins against their own body. 19 Do you not know that your bodies are temples of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; 20 you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your bodies.
1. 1 Corinthians 6:16 Gen. 2:24
2. 1 Corinthians 6:17 Or in the Spirit
Philippians 1:6 (NIV)
6 being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.
James 1:1-6 (NIV)
1 James, a servant of God and of the Lord Jesus Christ,
To the twelve tribes scattered among the nations:
2 Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters,[a] whenever you face trials of many kinds, 3 because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. 4 Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything. 5 If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you. 6 But when you ask, you must believe and not doubt, because the one who doubts is like a wave of the sea, blown and tossed by the wind.
1. James 1:2 The Greek word for brothers and sisters (adelphoi) refers here to believers, both men and women, as part of God’s family; also in verses 16 and 19; and in 2:1, 5, 14; 3:10, 12; 4:11; 5:7, 9, 10, 12, 19.
Psalm 40:1-6 (NKJV)
40 I waited patiently for the Lord;
And He inclined to me,
And heard my cry.
2 He also brought me up out of a horrible pit,
Out of the miry clay,
And set my feet upon a rock,
And established my steps.
3 He has put a new song in my mouth—
Praise to our God;
Many will see it and fear,
And will trust in the Lord.
4 Blessed is that man who makes the Lord his trust,
And does not respect the proud, nor such as turn aside to lies.
5 Many, O Lord my God, are Your wonderful works
Which You have done;
And Your thoughts toward us
Cannot be recounted to You in order;
If I would declare and speak of them,
They are more than can be numbered.
6 Sacrifice and offering You did not desire;
My ears You have opened.
Burnt offering and sin offering You did not require.
Hebrews 2:18 (NIV)
18 Because he himself suffered when he was tempted, he is able to help those who are being tempted.
Isaiah 43:16-21 (NKJV)
16 Thus says the Lord, who makes a way in the sea
And a path through the mighty waters,
17 Who brings forth the chariot and horse,
The army and the power
(They shall lie down together, they shall not rise;
They are extinguished, they are quenched like a wick):
18 “Do not remember the former things,
Nor consider the things of old.
19 Behold, I will do a new thing,
Now it shall spring forth;
Shall you not know it?
I will even make a road in the wilderness
And rivers in the desert.
20 The beast of the field will honor Me,
The jackals and the ostriches,
Because I give waters in the wilderness
And rivers in the desert,
To give drink to My people, My chosen.
21 This people I have formed for Myself;
They shall declare My praise.
John 8:1-11 (NIV)
8 1 but Jesus went to the Mount of Olives.
2 At dawn he appeared again in the temple courts, where all the people gathered around him, and he sat down to teach them. 3 The teachers of the law and the Pharisees brought in a woman caught in adultery. They made her stand before the group 4 and said to Jesus, “Teacher, this woman was caught in the act of adultery. 5 In the Law Moses commanded us to stone such women. Now what do you say?” 6 They were using this question as a trap, in order to have a basis for accusing him.
But Jesus bent down and started to write on the ground with his finger. 7 When they kept on questioning him, he straightened up and said to them, “Let any one of you who is without sin be the first to throw a stone at her.” 8 Again he stooped down and wrote on the ground.
9 At this, those who heard began to go away one at a time, the older ones first, until only Jesus was left, with the woman still standing there. 10 Jesus straightened up and asked her, “Woman, where are they? Has no one condemned you?”
11 “No one, sir,” she said.
“Then neither do I condemn you,” Jesus declared. “Go now and leave your life of sin.”
Luke 7:36-8:3 (NIV)
36 When one of the Pharisees invited Jesus to have dinner with him, he went to the Pharisee’s house and reclined at the table. 37 A woman in that town who lived a sinful life learned that Jesus was eating at the Pharisee’s house, so she came there with an alabaster jar of perfume. 38 As she stood behind him at his feet weeping, she began to wet his feet with her tears. Then she wiped them with her hair, kissed them and poured perfume on them.
39 When the Pharisee who had invited him saw this, he said to himself, “If this man were a prophet, he would know who is touching him and what kind of woman she is—that she is a sinner.”
40 Jesus answered him, “Simon, I have something to tell you.”
“Tell me, teacher,” he said.
41 “Two people owed money to a certain moneylender. One owed him five hundred denarii,[a] and the other fifty. 42 Neither of them had the money to pay him back, so he forgave the debts of both. Now which of them will love him more?”
43 Simon replied, “I suppose the one who had the bigger debt forgiven.”
“You have judged correctly,” Jesus said.
44 Then he turned toward the woman and said to Simon, “Do you see this woman? I came into your house. You did not give me any water for my feet, but she wet my feet with her tears and wiped them with her hair. 45 You did not give me a kiss, but this woman, from the time I entered, has not stopped kissing my feet. 46 You did not put oil on my head, but she has poured perfume on my feet. 47 Therefore, I tell you, her many sins have been forgiven—as her great love has shown. But whoever has been forgiven little loves little.”
48 Then Jesus said to her, “Your sins are forgiven.”
49 The other guests began to say among themselves, “Who is this who even forgives sins?”
50 Jesus said to the woman, “Your faith has saved you; go in peace.”
8 After this, Jesus traveled about from one town and village to another, proclaiming the good news of the kingdom of God. The Twelve were with him, 2 and also some women who had been cured of evil spirits and diseases: Mary (called Magdalene) from whom seven demons had come out; 3 Joanna the wife of Chuza, the manager of Herod’s household; Susanna; and many others. These women were helping to support them out of their own means.
1. Luke 7:41 A denarius was the usual daily wage of a day laborer (see Matt. 20:2).
1 Corinthians 6:9-11
1 Timothy 1:8-10
Jesus didn't have facebook, twitter & co. He didn't have a counseling agency for Church growth. All He had was 12... fb.me/1v9Rq3UI2
Hebrews 4:12 (KJV): "For the word of God is quick, and powerful, and sharper than any twoedged sword, piercing even to the dividing asunder of soul and spirit, and of the joints and marrow, and is a discerner of the thoughts and intents of the heart."
Our goal is not heterosexuality. Our goal is holiness!
Homosexuals Anonymous - probably the oldest and longest-running organization in the world helping individuals with unwanted same-sex attraction (SSA)! Founded in 1976, first meeting in 1977 (late in the year)!!
Or goal is not to turn "homos" into "heteros". We help people who - for whatever reason - do not want to act out on their same-sex attractions. We do this through pastoral care, Christian counseling, individual talks or group meetings. Who are we to tell them that their goals are not to be pursued?
Nevertheless it is striking that meanwhile professionals as well as gay activists are talking of a "fluidity" of human sexuality. This means in other words that nothing is set in stone here but open for - however defined - change.
In spite of this "conversion therapy" is fanatically being attacked. You can't have it both ways though. Either there is fluidity of human sexuality - implying openness for change - or not.
Human sexuality is influenced by many different internal and external factors. Even the activation or deactivation - or even the development (!) - of genes depends on envirnonment and behavior. Black and white statement may have a political background, there is one thing, however, they are not: scientific.
“One of the most pathetic—and dangerous—signs of our times is the growing number of individuals and groups who believe that no one can possibly disagree with them for any honest reason.”
"The chief danger of the 20th century will be religion without the Holy Spirit, Christianity without Christ, forgiveness without repentance, and heaven without hell." Gen. William Booth (1829-1912), Salvation Army founder
“Every sin is a choice to turn a miraculous being into an object for consumption. It flattens the human person, one’s self and one’s victim, into a one-dimensional universe.”
― Michael D. O'Brien, Father Elijah: An Apocalypse
The only reason why people don't find freedom from same-sex attractions is because they don't believe it can be done!
"Just because you do not take an interest in politics doesn't mean politics won't take an interest in you."
- Pericles (Greek - Statesman 495 BC - 429 BC)
NOTE: With our 14-step program "Lord, Set Me Free!" we do NOT try to suppress or change someone's sexual orientation. We use it as a tool to assist those who have same-sex attractions but choose not to live them out (for whatever reason). We help them find a fulfilled life according to the goals and values they choose for themselves.
"The world offers you comfort. But you were not made for comfort. You were made for greatness."
Pope emeritus Benedict XVI
Whatworks best?Youneeda lovegreaterthanyourdesireforthesamesex.Alovethattranscendseverything.Alovethatgoesbeyond yourwildestimaginationand dreams.AloveandadeepdesireforGod. Robert
‘Come to me, all you that are weary and are carrying heavy burdens, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me; for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.
“In this world are many people who do not master their bodies. Such people say that no one can tell them what to do, not even God, and they think that in this way they have no master. In the end they become slaves to anything.”
― Michael D. O'Brien, The Island of the World
Don't just look around what resources you have. Find out about your potential!
"I've tried pretty much everything, but I guess I will always be gay!"
You are neither "gay" nor "straight". You are "you". As a Christian you can say you were born in the image of God. But even as a non-believer you have your very own special design. No need to define an extra "identity" for every single sexual practice or orientation.
Having accepted this, there is no need to strive for a change from "gay" to "straight". It is not your sexuality that defines you, but your belief system. Christians want to be more like Jesus (and not just "straight"). People with other belief systems have their own goals and values as well
Nobody can take that away from you. It is you (!) that decides who you are and which way you want your life to go. Don't let anyone take that away from you!
Homosexuals Anonymous does not aim to alter the sexual orientation of minors.
However, if minors ask of Christian counseling and/or pastoral care and their parents are okay with that, we will gladly offer it to them.
We are a self-support organization and as such do not offer or recommend any kind of therapy for people with same-sex attractions. However, we support the right of every individual with same-sex attractions, their families, friends or anybody interested to have free access to all information regarding this topic. Only then can you come to a reasonable evaluation and decision as to how your viewpoint of this is.
Not from gay to straight, but from lost to saved!
NOTE: Expressions like "freedom from homosexuality", "change", "healing" or "recovery" do NOT refer to a change from homosexuality to heterosexuality but to a personal decision to live a fulfilled life beyond the gay scene. A life following Jesus Christ.
Wir lehnen Konversionstherapien ab und bieten grundsätzlich keine Therapien an. Ebenso wenig machen wir hierfür Werbung. Unser Ziel ist nicht "von schwul zu hetero“, sondern „näher zu Jesus“!
We oppose conversion therapies and do not offer any therapies whatsoever nor do we make publicity for them. Our goal is not "from gay to hetero“, but „closer to Jesus“!
Note: The work of Dr. Douglas McIntyre is being shown in part for documentation purposes only. That does NOT mean we embrace all of it or make publicity for its content in its entirety.
Not freedom from homosexuality, but freedom for God !
Nicht Freiheit von Homosexualität, sondern Freiheit für Gott!
Points to ponder for "Ex-Gay Ministries":
The goal of whatever services or programs you offer can never be to become and remain sexually pure. Not to do something must never be a goal. Why? Because our brain cannot NOT process information. If you keep on telling someone not to have sex, not to look at porn etc., his or her brain will focus on sex and porn (example: If I tell you "Do not think of a rose elephant! Do not think of a rose elephant! Do not think of a rose elephant! - what are you thinking of? A rose elephant, even if you haven't thought of one for all of your life!) Sexual purity can at best be a means to a goal, but never a goal in and of itself. As a Christian, my goal is to be holy, to become more like Jesus. and follow Him. The non-Christians among us must define their own goal, which has to be specific, measurable, achievable, reasonable, time bound ("SMART") and positive.
You do not measure "success" in your programs by the number of participants who do not have sex, or who marry or whatever else in that direction. Just imagine measuring success for a Christian by not sinning anymore. The success rate would be zero.
Be family. When someone falls, help him or her up again, find out why it happened and help him or her to stand more stable from now on. Don't brag with statements like "I have never had sex for 20 years!". That might even be true, but I am sure you sinned in different ways. So nothing to boast of.
Stop making a living out of "being ex-gay" through preaching to the choir (traveling from church to church and talking to those who already share your opinion while charging a honorarium for it or writing books that you sell to exactly those believers). Jesus told us to go OUT. To pass His love and truth on to those who have never experienced it. Don't found a ministry and wait who will be coming. Those you want to reach will not be reached by that. They will most likely never even hear from it, and if they do the information will be filtered through other people who reject you.
For a while I was honored to serve as a volunteer in a local jail. The inmates there can smell a mile away what your true motivation is for visiting them. Are you really interested in them as persons and human beings - or do you simply want to raise your number of converts and knock the "visiting prisoners" part off your Christian to-do-list?
If you keep on giving testimony on how you "found freedom", if your whole life focuses only on "being an ex-gay" and if you are even financially dependent on that aspect of your life, chances are high you will never really find freedom as you keep on living in the past and stiring old things up.
Be open for gays and ex-gays. Your counselees alone decide upon the goal they want to reach. If someone decides to "stay gay" and needs your help in a certain issue, be there for him/her just the same. Our love needs to be unconditional.
When have we shown love to gay and lesbian people for the last time? Why not meeting with them, having a cup of coffee, becoming friends with some of them? Sometimes we only see the sin part in them. As if we are pure and do not sin. An example: A very dear friend of mine has been taking care of his severyl handicapped male partner for about 15 years now. They stopped having sex a long time ago as it is physically hardly possible anymore. He takes care of his partner 24/7 - he washes him, takes him to the bathroom, organizes his life, does the household and much more. The Christian knee-jerk reaction of some might be now to claim that as they do not have sex anymore all is fine. That is condescending, unloving and actually very un-Christian. This man shows love to his partner in a way that few people who claim themselves "Christian" do.
Stop talking about gays and lesbians as if they were only sick and pervert people that will go to hell anyway. Yes, the number of sexually transmitted diseases is much higher among them than among the rest of the peopulation. Yes, the average partnership lasts not as long as the average heterosexual one and is much less monogamous. Yes, sex is usually much more "creative" than that of heterosexual couples. But, that does in no way mean we should look down on them and think we know everything better. That we may stand on our podium and psychologically analyse them (while never having really met them and/or having no psychological training ourselves). Yes, there is a reason why people are doing what they are doing. If we want to be of any help we need to show genuine interest and love them like Christ would. Yes, at Christians we should point people to the Good News by our words and deeds but in the end it is God alone who decides who will go to heaven or hell. There are around 40.000 Christian denominations so far with totally different beliefs. We can't even agree on the basics. So none of us should ever claim to know everything and have it all together. Pride is the root of all evil - which applies to us as well.
As Christians, the basic rules to go by are to love God and others like ourselves. To go out and make disciples. All other rules and laws flow out of these. Yes, Christian love is more than a passing feeling. It is a covenant thing. A decision of the will. It implies humbleness, being unconditional, courage, self-sacrifice. It does not imply pride - on neither side.
Gays vs. Ex-Gays
Points to ponder for gays regarding their attitude towards ex-gays
Most gay people have never heard of ex-gays. Those who did usually have a very negative view of them. Ex-Gays are supposed to deny their sexuality (thereby becoming mentally ill), they are backwards oriented, old-school, radical, fundamental in their Christian faith, homophobic, haters and most of all adherents of "conversion therapies". So let's go into that.
Do ex-gays deny their sexuality? No, not at all. They use their sexual energy simply another way, like by letting their gifts and talents blossom, by becoming active and creative and by not letting their whole life turn around "being gay". You can just as well turn the argument around: People who think that you need to have sex in order not to deny your sexuality have a very disturbed view on and relationship towards it.
Are ex-gays becoming mentally ill because they "deny" their sexuality? This argument usually is brought up by people who do not have the slightest training in psychology and/or psychiatry. A mental disorder usually takes a whole bunch of different factors to develop. Hardly ever it is a single one. Mental disordders should also never be used to further a political position.
Again, you can just as well turn the argument around: Does not in many cases an excessive gay life play a major part in developping mental disorders and physical diseases (like through attracting and passing on of sexually transmitted diseases)?
Are ex-gays backwards oriented, old-school, radical, fundamental in their Christian faith, homophobic, and haters? All of that uses the same dirty propaganda technique (that sometimes reminds me of the Nazis by the way): You just have to repeat a lie often enough so people will believe it in the end. If you do not have good arguments, you put the "adversary" in a radical corner and make him look like a fanatic criminal with (again) mental problems. That makes you look pure and good and the other one dirty and evil. Hardly anybody though is purely good or purely bad just as well as hardly any motivation is by the way. Why not just sit down and listen - really listen! - to each other, without coming up with knee-jerk reactions at once? Why not grant the other side the right to have a rationally well-founded argument? Why not accept the fact that the other side could also be right or that they could at least have a valid alternative?
Could it be that sometimes we need the other side to look bad because we cannot accept the fact that they could have a point there? Because that would ruin our whole system of argumentation?
Ex-Gays can hardly be homophobic haters as they have same-sex attractions themselves. That "argument" actually reveals more about the person that uses it than about the one being attacked.
No ex-gay I know has ever supported conversion therapies. Gay-friendly politicians know that and still push anti-conversion-therapy legistlation just the same - in order to wipe off the surface of the earth all opposition against gay points of view. However, we want science and research to be independent. Even gay activists use the argument of "sexual fluidity" sometimes (they have to, else they could not make a point for being transgender). Given the fact that many factors contribute to the development of human sexuality and taken into account modern research on epigenetics we all have to adapt our positions on a regular basis, even if it hurts and does not fit our world view.
Why not see our common same-sex attractions as a common foundation and work together instead of against one another? Why can't gay counselors accept an ex-gay belief system and help the person leave a gay life if she or he wants that? Or the other way around?
I am just naive enough to believe that this can be done.
Never say "I love you, but..." or "Jesus loves you, but...". That "but" kills everything before. Either you love someone unconditionally or you don't. Ain't no in-between.
From our members and friends:
"HA has been the most transforming change agent in my born again life. My being, identity, self esteem was shattered into little pieces."
"I can honestly say HA deals with individuals struggling with sexual issues in a loving and caring manner. It uses the Bible, prayer, and group dynamics to provide individuals with hope and practical insights.
The emphasis is on reconciling one's self with his or her creator. In turn,one clarifies his or her true moral values for guiding his or her life.. The whole focus is on seeking holiness in one's day to day living.
HA invites individuals to participate in its meetings without coercion. If any changes are made by the individual, it is a result of his or her own choice. Everyone has the right to seek out like-minded individuals who wish to share their life stories and to share their religious beliefs.
I have seen individuals benefit from their participation in the group meetings, and the Bible studies. Needless to say, I have benefited greatly too!"
"Why do people think HA practices conversation therapy? Does AA or SAA (Sex Addiction Anonymous) practice conversion therapy? I think not. As a member of HA, I experience such ‘accusations’ or statements as oppressive, ignorant and unethical. I choose how I express my sexuality, integrate my beliefs, morality and preferences according to who I am. Nobody can or has a right to impose their beliefs onto me. I work out my own journey on a daily basis, only I can work it and walk it. It is a unique journey and I treasure the life it brings. HA is a non-judgemental, non-intrusive support for me in this process. There is certainly no hidden agenda to convert anyone to heterosexuality. However, I question the agenda of those who deny me this right to self determination. On the contrary, in HA there is space for each individual to uniquely emerge in an non-directive way, based on self-acceptance, love and mutual support. As a psychotherapist, I can say with great confidence that there is nothing unethical about the approach of HA and I would recommend it to anyone who desires to be free from the power of homosexual addiction and of unwanted same sex attraction. If during this process one discovers a more true-to-self sexual identity, so be it. Such has been my experience."
"Homosexuals Anonymous and Jason International are doing great work! In a day and age when there is more confusion than ever about sexuality, gender identity and the nature of the human person as lovingly created male or female by God, you are a beacon of clarity and light. You give hope to many by courageously proclaiming the message that embracing God's design and purpose for sexuality, no matter how difficult, is the best way to live a happy life."
"Homosexuality is an attempt to achieve human contact and to break
through stark isolation." [Charles Socarides, Homosexuality, p. 159]
We always get to hear about "conversion therapy". I have been with ex-gays for 16 years now and dealt with a great number of them in several countries around the globe. How come I have never met a single one who has undergone this kind of therapy or even knows one who did? This whole thing looks more and more like a myth to me.
Seelsorge für Minderjährige nur mit Einverständnis der Eltern und auch dann nur im Rahmen der gesetzlichen Möglichkeiten!
Christian counseling and pastoral care for minors only if their parents agree and only as far as the law allows it!
Our goal is NOT to turn gay people into straight ones. We assist people with same-sex attractions who decide by their free will that they do not wish to live a "gay" life. In that context we help them to develop an alternative life the nature of which is alone in the hands of our clients.
Even people who wish to live a "gay" life will find pastoral care and Christian counseling at Homosexuals Anonymous, if they wish to have it.
Before the age of 2, Helen Keller was stricken with a disease (the doctors don't agree as to what it was) that left her permanently blind and deaf. If you've not seen it, the movie The Miracle Worker, with Anne Bancroft and Patty Duke, is an excellent story of the beginning of her story. Today's attached devotional will reveal the secret of how she became one of the most celebrated women in the world! God bless you!
Because of Calvary,
“If I regarded my life from the point of view of the pessimist, I should be undone. Ishould seek in vain for the light that does not visit my eyes and the mastic that does notring in my ears. I should beg might and day and never be satisfied. I should sit apart inawful solitude, a prey to fear and despair. But since I consider it a duty to myself and toothers to be happy, I escape a misery worse than any physical deprivation.” [Helen Kellerin Don’t Forget to Sing in the Lifeboats and 366 Other Bits of Uncommon Wisdom forUncommon Times compiled by Kathryn & Ross Petras, (New York: WorkmanPublishing, 2009), p. 190]
"All truth passes through three stages. First, it is ridiculed. Second, it is violently opposed. Third, it is accepted as being self-evident."
Arthur Schopenhauer 1788-1860
Therapy-related content does not mean we endorse those practices. It has only informational purpose.
"Freedom from homosexuality" does not mean that we aim to never again have same-sex attractions. Spiritually speaking, it means freedom from the power of sin. Beyond that it refers to the freedom to choose a life according to your values and principles and not letting an oriention order you what life you must live.
Wir machen keinerlei Therapien, wir empfehlen insbesondere keine Konversionstherapien und werben auch nicht für eine Teilnahme an einer derartigen Therapie noch vermitteln wir keine solche.
We offer no therapy whatsoever. Especially we do not recommend conversion therapies nor do we make any publicity for them.
Prohibit homosexual acts? I have always been totally against that. If you consider all the different factors that contribute to the development of human sexuality - most of all homosexuality - as well as the legitimate needs and past hurts that stand behind quote a few sexual activities, it is nonsense to think a prohibition could change something here. On the contrary.
However, if I see what is going on on gay dating sites - especially among men (and of course later on also "live") - I ask myself seriously if somebody has to protect us of ourselves. When men yield to their sexual impulses almost without any boundaries, that hardly ever ends well...
We must accept God's will, especially when he says no.